Thursday, January 26, 2006

Super Dilemma

Meaty is threatening to take away my DVR if I don't blog more, so I've decided to get back on the horse.

The Super Bowl is slowly beginning to permeate every single media outlet (I'm hoping to see Joey Porter on The View), so it's about that time for me to pick a side to root for. Lately, it hasn't been that difficult. Root against the Patriots or Ravens (Note: as a Browns and Packers fan, I have had the "luxury" of being able to choose who to root for in the Super Bowl). However, this year, I've been having a difficult time choosing a side.

On one hand, I could root for the Pittsburgh Steelers. The Jerome Bettis "finally-making-it-to-a-Super-Bowl-in-his-hometown-last-game-before-retirement" storyline would usually be enough for me. However, this is Shitsburgh, and I'm a Browns fan, talk about heresy. Then there is the fact that Big Ben is from Findlay, Ohio, a "hometown" boy. Unfortunately, he turned down OSU, I'm not sure I can forgive him for this (point of order: If you've seen what Miami girls look like, you can't really blame him for this). There's Troy Polamalu as well, who is one of the most exciting players to watch and I really have no reason to hate him.

On the other hand, we have the Seahawks. Their team colors are teal and light blue, I think. Also, the team is named after a waterfowl. Yeah, we know that Seattle is on a bay, but that doesn't necessitate naming professional sports franchises after a harbor bird. How about the turquoise and gold of those Oakland Pelicans! No. Furthermore, Matt Hasselback is related to Tim Hasselback, who is married to the hot chick from The View. Therefore, I hate him by relation (for those of you counting at home, that's two View references in one blog, I'm definitely rusty). But really, people from Seattle are miserable, and don't deserve a Super Bowl title.

Bill Cowher's jaw gives women orgasms. I'm rooting for the Steelers. Did I mention I'll be in Pittsburgh for the big game, so there's a much better chance I get laid if I don a Duce Staley jersey and root for the Stillers.

5 comments:

penxv said...

You traitor... you good for nothing traitor.

White Sox in 06!!!

Tre! said...

I know, I feel so dirty even thinking about it.

trotskey said...

Ouch, I can hardly think of a less deserving team than the Queelers (Queer + Steelers, get it). Anyone who roots for a team in our division should foster an intense hatred for the dirty Steelers. The only thing worthwhile sports-wise to come out of Pittsburgh is the Panthers.

Energy Spatula said...

I can't believe you'd go against my team like that. Well, not my team...since I probably won't even watch, but every other person in this city is OBSESSED. Plus, I got to law school with the coach's daughter, so I think we all have to root for our team.

Anonymous said...

Does everyone remember "The Immaculate Reception"? Yeah, that time where a ball off the helmet landed in Franco Harris' hands and a seemingly impossible victory happenned?

Well, NFL officials, not anticipating this type of event had to amend the rules so that this type of play would not happen again. As such, when a pass hits a players helmet, the play is dead.

NFL Rule 403.2.7 THE STEELERS ARE DIRTY ROTTEN CHEAP BASTARDS THAT CANNOT WIN A GAME WITHOUT SOME SORT OF ACT OF GOD (Troy Polamalu get a haircut)

ZS