Saturday, January 21, 2006


We've talked before about how the once-proud Lions are being run into the ground by the genius Matt Millen. Since then, Millen went out and flirted with the idea of bringing in Jim Haslett (career record 46-51) as the next head coach before settling on darkhorse candidate Rod Marinelli, who has no head coaching or coordinating experience. Marinelli is the third head coach hired by Millen in the last five years, and interestingly, all three of them have names that start with M (Marty Mornhinweg and Steve Mariucci combined for a 20-55 record in just under five seasons). My friend Kenny obtained the exclusive transcript of Marinelli's interview:

Millen: Welcome to Detroit, Mr. ....
Marinelli: Marinelli.
Millen: Mmmmmarinelli?
Marinelli: Yes. Now, let me tell you what I'll bring to the Lions ...
Millen: How's that spelled?
Marinelli: M-a ...
Millen: Wait, Marinelli starts with "M"?
Marinelli: Yes.
Millen: Wow, so does Millen!
Marinelli: Yes, now as to the Lions ...
Millen: You're hired!


Anonymous said...

YCGAFBE: It was nice of you to leave out more of the interview, but in case your readers are interested, I can attest, as a former Detroit-area resident, that there were likely more questions:

Millen: WOW! Did you know that Moron starts with an "M" too?

Marinelli: Yes, but back to the Lions.

Millen: NO, WAIT. Doesn't mediocre start with "M" too?

Marinelli: Well, yes it does, but let's forget about LLLLLoyd Carr. I'd really like to talk about my vision for this team.

Millen: Team? That word has an "M" in it too. But it's at the end, so that "Team" really doesn't count. Let's talk about better words that start with "M."

Marinelli: Okay, "M"other-f--ker. How 'bout you pay me a couple of "M"illion Dollars to coach this team and give me a few "M"illion more as a buy-out? And while you're at it, why don't you buy me an offensive line?

Millen: But "O-line" doesn't start with "M," maybe I could buy you a "Must-Have Receiver." I'm really good at picking those.

Marinelli: And I get a few "M"illion dollars to sign up for this? Okay.

EK said...

I'd like to echo in pointing out that Marinelli contains all the letters in "Millen."

Gag me with a black facemask.