Thursday, January 19, 2006

Crim Pro Quotes 2

"Ever since I've been in Academia, I haven't been able to enjoy Christmas, well, that's the ACLU's fault, but beside that."

"In my younger days when I was the in Marines, I used to live in New Orleans, I mean, before it sunk into the ocean like the lost city of Atlantis. I used to jog as well, and it would be when everyone was leaving the bars. And I thought to myself, this is just like being a professor, these people have been drinking (studying) all night, then it's just regurgitation in the street (on the exam), and the professor has to sit there and pick through the puke to find little pieces of meat."

"Back right before I went to law school, there was this guy, Jesus Christ, and he got arrested and dragged in. Then Pontius Pilate was like, Jesus Christ, if you're no fool, walk across my swimming pool. Is that testimonial?"

"OK, now what if I held a mirror in front of Dracula?"

"We had a lot of debates around the Thanksgiving table this weekend. Fortunately, I won every single one of them."

"We're going to do evaluations today, I'd recommend that you either speak generously or generally."

Student: "I have a lot of other exams to study for."
Prof. : "But surely you'd concede that Criminal Procedure is your most important."
Student: "Of course."
Prof." "Good, all I ask for is honesty."

"Many, many years ago, when you were just a thought in your mother's eye, I pushed very hard for a curve, and the anti-curve flower children thought we should just have a degree. And I banded together with some other young turks that weren't quite as turkish, and in the worst of all worlds we adopted the curve to a B approach."

"There may be some things that are confuzzling, as Snoop Dogg would say."


Matt said...

You gotta love that dude. Do you think he ever sampled any "Jamican Gold" back in the day?

Lyco said...

This is your professor? I am jealous!

Tre! said...

Haha, back in the day?

Today's "Does anybody care anymore? Anyone? Anyone?" was priceless.