Sunday, December 11, 2005

Your bimonthly NFL update

Went to the Browns-Bengals game here in Cincinnati today. While I will resist the urge to talk about how it took the Bengals until the last play to beat a 4-9 Browns team and how they won't go far in the playoffs with a team like that, I do want to share one story with you.

Whilst leaving the stadium after the game with my brother and two friends, I kept hearing a high-pitched voice next to me. I ignored it initially until I realized it was directed at me. I looked down to find a young girl walking next to me whom I would guess to be about eight years old -- maybe a little younger, as she was missing two of her front teeth. She had been repeatedly saying "Long way back to loserville, asshole!" An eight year-old!

After I recovered from my initial shock, I explained that the joke was on her because I live in Cincinnati (she honestly appeared to be devastated, it was pretty funny). Then I told her father that he was a bad parent and that he should be ashamed of himself. I'm not entirely sure, but I think the girl started crying at about that point.

But seriously. Eight year olds, dude.

Oh, also, in other NFL news, the Chiefs just got shafted on that penalty on fourth and goal, and would someone please tell the Fox network that the Eagles, Giants and Cowboys are not only not the only teams in the NFC, they're actually the NFC teams that people in this city care least about? Any other team next week. Please. I beg you.


Anonymous said...

I don't know who's worse: the eight year old, the parent, or the jealous Browns fans.

You would think there would be a little bit of respect for Marvin Lewis and what he has done in Cincinnati. No, instead, certain Browns fans will critique the Bengals for one "let down" after their biggest win in the last 15 years of the franchise. Guess what? The Bengals still won.

And please, do not stereotype an entire group of fans on one encounter with a hillbilly. I'm sure the fat, drunk, Dawgpound that prides itself on throwing snowballs at opposing players is just as respectable.


Nye! said...

I don't know what's worse: the Bengals' playoff chances, or a hypocritical Bengals fan who has to trash the Browns under a cloak of anonymity because he knows the Bengals' playoff chances aren't any good.

Let's be clear about something -- I'm not jealous of the Bengals at all. What was it, 15 years in a row at .500 or worse? You realize that the Browns had 3 more playoff appearances in that span than the Bengals, despite not having a team from 96 through 98, right? Not sure why on Earth I'd be jealous of that.

Oh by the way, congratulations on your 18th consecutive sellout today. Very impressive. Your stadium only holds 65,000 people and you couldn't even sell it out three years ago? Yeah, just real dedicated fans here in Cincinnati. I guess there's a reason that 25 of the other 31 NFL teams have bigger stadiums -- it's the fair-weather fans.

Also, I've never understood this -- if the Browns are so bad, why did the Bengals steal their coach, their colors, and their initials? They may have named their stadium after Paul Brown, but let's not forget that Paul Brown named the Browns after himself. Cincinnati, still second fiddle.

But Marvin Lewis I like. Good coach.

As for a let-down after beating the Steelers last week, I'm sorry, but that's exactly my point. The good teams don't have let-downs like that. Yeah, they squeaked out a road win against Pittsburgh when Roethlisberger had a busted thumb, but got hammered by the Steelers at home. The Bengals are 2-3 against playoff-bound teams with a game at Kansas City still to play.

While we're on the topic, a note to that one Bengals fan on CBS -- shouting "We'll see you in the Super Bowl, Indy!" maybe wasn't such a good idea. Because the Bengals and Colts are both in the AFC, they actually cannot play each other in the Super Bowl. But if you'd be following the team for more than eight weeks, I guess you'd know that. Good work.

And please, don't tell me not to stereotype people one sentence before you do it. That killed any credibility you would have had.

So yeah, the Bengals managed a win today. Congratulations, you beat a bad team. Do you honestly think Cleveland fans went this nuts after beating the Bengals during those 15 consecutive non-winning seasons? Oh, right, you didn't follow the team then so you wouldn't know, I forgot.

I'll just have to sit tight until June when the Indians come to town, and their pitching staff can out-homer your entire team again. Till then!

trotskey said...

Without the Giants on Fox every week I would miss my Tiki, and the opportunity to see Tom Coughlin make a fool out of himself week after week by using Brandon "Chokemaster General" Jacobs for goal line carries. Does anyone remember that game a few weeks back when Tiki scored from the one yard line on a rush up the middle, then scored the two point conversion on a similar run? You did the same thing in Jacksonville Coughlin. Listen to Troy Aikman and let Tiki score. Bengals forever. Browns, well you might be good in about four or five years if you're lucky...But probably not. WHO DEY

Anonymous said...



Anonymous said...

My take on the Game:

Playoff teams should watch tapes of the Browns defense. It did pretty well against both "no huddle" offenses in Indianapolis and Cincinnati.

The Browns have a promising future. Romeo is going to put a winner on the field, and Frey looks pretty solid for his first two NFL starts. Give your own team some credit, and instead of trashing the Cincinnati Bengals, realize that there are some positives on the Cleveland Browns.

Finally, it is a natural reaction by any city for its attendance to rise when they put a good product on the field. For the best example, look at your Cleveland Indians. Throughout the 80s and early 90s they were the joke of MLB and so wasn't their attendance. I, myself, attended a game where the attendance was well below 10,000 people. Then, all of a sudden, the Indians put a good team on the field, and they sellout from 1995-2001. Very impressive, but where were all of the Tribe fans in the 80s and early 90s?

I wouldn't be so bold to name all of the Indians fans bandwagoners. They probably just weighed the costs of attending a MLB baseball game against the atheltic performance they were going to see and decided to stay home. (They made a major mistake, because Cory Snyder and Pat Tabler were exciting to watch.)

Through 15 years of misery, Bengals fans have done the same, and now, when the team is fun to watch, we want to go to a game. Therefore, cut us Bengals fans some slack. We've watched over a decade of crap. Now, when the team is finally exciting we are labeled as "bandwagoners." It's a no-win situation.

"Leaving his Odell Thurman jersey at home for fear of it undermining his credibility as a fan"

Nye! said...

You're right Curtis -- I shouldn't rag on the real fans. The trouble is, I'm pretty confident that the people who are giving me shit aren't real fans. The guy who was sitting behind me at the game yesterday, for example, didn't even know how many games there were in an NFL season. He was very excited that the Bengals were going to finish up 10-4 -- a calculation that not only forgets the final two weeks of the season, but predicts a loss against Detroit next week.

As for the Indians fans, there is obviously a big difference between selling out a small stadium for 8 games a year and selling out a giant stadium for 81 games a year (The Capacity for Cleveland Municipal Stadium was "officially" 78,000, but Browns games typically held about 84,000.) Baseball stadiums selling out are the exception, not the rule, in every baseball city. Even bad football teams (e.g., the Browns for most of the last seven seasons) sell out regularly.

Herewith, a formal apology to real Bengals fans (like Curtis, Drew, Finnigan, Dan, etc.) -- you have a good team. You beat my team yesterday and yes, that hurts. Congratulations.

To the other Bengals fans (like the guy sitting behind me yesterday) -- blow me.

Tre! said...

I find it hard to trash the Bengals, as the Browns are following a similar model in rebuilding.

However, I don't think the Bengals go past the first round. Their defense relies too much on the turnover. However, give Thurman and Pollack one more year playing in the NFL, I think that will change.

Also Curtis, you can't really discredit Indians fans. Longest sellout streak in Major League history, not even the Yankees, Red Sox, Dodgers, or As can claim that. 455 straight games is legit, no matter how you want to cut it. Especially for us downtrodden Clevelanders.

Anonymous said...

Nye, when the Bengals played the Jags on Sunday night, they put up an interesting statistic. During the 15 consecutive non-winning seasons, the Bengals home game attendance was an aveage of 54,000, so you can't call Bengals fans fair-weather fans.

Nye! said...

I'll reiterate -- I'm not ragging on all Bengals fans here. But for what it's worth, 54,000 fans wouldn't even be a sellout in the NFL's smallest stadium.

Anonymous said...

I'm guessing your obsession with attendance revolves around the fact you can't point to what really matters: The Indians choking in the 90's and the sad state of the current Browns.

Nye! said...

I pointed to attendance because you brought it up again. Let's not talk about choking in the 90s -- 15 consecutive seasons, remember?

Anonymous said...


I'm not trashing the Indians consecutive sell outs. As I said, it was very impressive.

The point of mentioning the sell outs was that before the Indians put a winner on the field, the attendance in Cleveland was pathetic. There is no escaping this fact.

The Indians attendance, like the Bengals current sell outs, is an example of a simple truth. When teams are successful, they have a higher attendance; it's common sense.

Bengals fans should not be singled out as any different than the average sports fan. So, cut us a break and let us enjoy the ride. Your chance is coming in a couple of years.