Monday, November 28, 2005

Weddings Mean Love (and booze)

So I've been meaning to post this for awhile, but just kept forgetting, finally Nye reminded me with his post of the IM convo the other day.

This summer I had a number of weddings to attend. Each wedding was preceded by a pretty good email thread of a bunch of mid-20s guys trying to figure out how to act at a wedding. I'll try to post some of the "greatest hits" every now and then. Here's one thread:

From: W
Subject: Dress for the wedding
Guys, I was wondering if I have to wear a suit at the wedding, it's gonna be pretty hot out all day. What do you think?

From: L
Subject: RE:Dress for the wedding

W, stop your bitching. I am going to be wearing a fucking tux in the burg in July at an outdoor wedding. For your information it is currently 99 degrees in the burg. On a serious note though, I think the suit is the more appropriate outfit. Just do what Tre does: dress up in a suit and 15 minutes into the reception/formal get so drunk the suit and shirt are off and sweat is pouring through your undershirt. I will also be following this methodology this weekend.I would love to be standing at the altar and turn to see your two drunk asses smoking a cigarette in the back row. Extra points if Tre’s tie is already off. Wear the suit you Greek.

From: W
Rest assured L, me and tre will be in the back, blacked out, smoking, taking a piss that we can’t hold, and yelling "Don’t do it (groom)! (bride) is whore! And (other groomsman) is a vagina!"...we will then give eachother hi-fives for yelling "vagina" so loud...Funny thing is, something tells me you’ll be doing the same thing up there in front of everyone...

Oh, and we're gonna do the best city in Ohio competition after exams. Too much effort right now. I want to do this bad boy right.

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