Monday, September 12, 2005

If Warrick Dunn can call out NFL players....

...I'm going to call out the parents of the cast of Laguna Beach. They are the real ones that could be donating lots of money to the relief efforts. Here is an outline for my plan:

Talan's parents donate $100 every time he acts like a douchebag

Kristin's parents donate $100 every time she acts slutty.

Stephen's parents donate $100 for every pound under 150 that he weighs.

Jessica's parents donate $250 for every time she acts desperate.

Jason's parents donate $500 for ever brain cell he has (this garners at least $2000).

However, the biggest moneymaker will be my main telethonish rule. Whenever your child uses "like" in the middle of a sentence, you pay $50 bucks. Conservative estimate for last show on this rule alone: $2,000,000.

I think you guys should really, like, think about doing this. You could, like, you know, help a lot of people. We've seen your homes, you can afford it. Like, maybe.


Cosmopolitan said...

Like, too funny. I so, like, agree. I know LC is your crush and she's one of my favorites too, but I'd like to add that her parents (the richest of them all, I do believe) need to donate $300 every time she makes her puppy dog eyes at Stephan.

Riss said...

I don't watch this show but that post made me laugh.