Friday, May 20, 2005

Let Freedom Ring

or summer begin, either or.

As my blogmate's previous post indicates, we finished up our first year exams yesterday.

This afternoon, I was rewarded with a physical and a drug test for my summer job. The only way to truly reward a man for a job well done is to have him pee in a cup, then allow a strange man to squeeze his testicles while he turns his head to the side and coughs. It wasn't until the check of the right testicle that I really began to appreciate the fruits of my labor. I was told I needed a physical because there is a certain amount of security clearance associated with this job. I don't really understand how the fact that I don't have a hernia correlates to an ability to keep a secret, but I'm sure that's something I'll learn in the second year of law school.

On a related note, I find it somewhat amazing that I passed the physical after the amount of stress, sleep-deprivation, and lack of exercise in my life for the last few weeks. The massive binge drink on Thursday afternoon led to a further peak in my physical condition.

Tonight, I was rewarded for my efforts this year by the Daytime Emmy Awards. I couldn't even bring myself to watch this for the unintentional comedy value. The DEAs consist of a bunch of really good looking people that can't act being awarded for . . . . . how good looking they are?? On a positive note, the DEAs did set a world record for most University of Phoenix Online graduates in one room at the same time. I think it takes some talent to host a talk show, so I won't say anything deroggatory about the daytime talk show hosts that won awards, but the soap opera awards are ridiculous. One award was "most irresistable couple." At least in this category the pretense of the awards being for acting was dropped. I was waiting for the winning couple to say how they would go home and put this award right next to their 'hottest bod: Cancun 1990' trophies. If there is anything the DEAs can teach us, it's that success in life is directly correlated to how tight your ass is.

The prospects for the rest of the night look a little better at least. E! is showing a rerun of the Saturday Night Live with Pee Wee Herman hosting.

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